


Trust Me

by Equivocation



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, a bit of ranting, slight eren/levi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-04
Updated: 2016-04-04
Packaged: 2018-05-31 05:20:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6457462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Equivocation/pseuds/Equivocation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She stared at the hand that held hers so, so tightly and she had never felt more cherished by her dearest friend. She wished that they could always stay like this.<br/>Eren just wished that he could bring himself to care for people before they were ripped away from him, because he didn't want to live a life of regret any longer.<br/>Canon-verse. Eremika & hints of Ereri. Don't own SnK.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Trust Me

The human populace had increased, substantially.

Dangerously so.

* * *

"I have a proposition".

"State what is on your mind, Commander Smith."

"With the increased populace now reaching its limit for comfortable human existence, the risk of famine the likes of which we have not seen in several years is quite inevitable-"

"That's nothing we haven't heard already, get to your poi-"

"That's enough Commander Dok. Commander Smith, nothing you have said is not something that we have already covered and established, to take the words out of Commander Dok's lips, get to your point."

"Apologies. My point is, rather than trying to force the hand of nature and try to produce more yield, which has a very small chance of success, I propose we launch a second retrieval mission into Wall Maria to alleviate the stress of famine which had already taken affect in some areas of outer Wall Rose."

"That's preposterous, we can't send more people to their deaths! We can't play-"

"Silence." Commander-in-Chief Zackly raise his hand, reprimanding the merchant before turning back to Commander Erwin Smith, "We have already implemented this method in the past, and it sparked civil unrest. Such a reception is to be avoided. How do you intend to deflect such a situation if the retrieval mission was approved?"

"The people partaking in the retrieval mission would have chosen to be there, we would take only volunteers."

"I fail to see how that would lessen the increased population, in my experience I find people are very unwilling to sacrifice their lives when it comes to it."

"With all due respect, I believe in quite the opposite, given the circumstances."

"And what would such a circumstance be that defies our innate desire to survive?"

"The death of their children and loved ones."

Gasps rippled throughout the courtroom in shock, scandalised at the words that the Commander of the Survey Corps had spoken with such boldness. Commander-in-Chief Zackly himself raised a brow at Commander Smith, a man he had come to respect greatly and although he trusted the man greatly, he was struggling to match the same man to the person who stood before him.

"I'm not sure I understand what you mean, I hope you realise what you are insinuating."

"Forgive me, I'm sure I could have worded that better, I mean nothing of the sort that is probably filling the heads of the court. I meant that, during this famine, there will be those that will not be able to feed their families. I am not a man to sugarcoat what he says, so please don't take offence at the manner of which I say what I am about to but, I believe that upon watching their children in pain and hungry, they will freely offer themselves to partake in the retrieval mission so that their children may stand a chance of surviving."

"I see."

A hand rose in objection, "Speak,"

A young merchant spoke, addressing Commander Smith more so than the Judge, in barely contained outrage, "That's completely unethical! How can you use the idea of our children dying to persuade the people to kill themselves?"

"I know I am not in any position to speak, but while people inside the inner walls may never experience the famine in any other way than increased prices on goods, the people living in the outer walls cannot say the same. These people would give up their lives regardless of the retrieval mission, we would merely be broadcasting the option so more people can consider. And I believe a considerable amount would choose to take such an option."

The hum bub of the court began swaying in favour of such an idea at those words, though the atmosphere remained tense and uneasy, the idea of sending people to certain death was not something to be taken lightly.

"And what would become of those left behind? Will they be left alone to die?"

"We will build spaces where orphaned children can stay until they are old enough to have a job, they will not have any less of a chance at life then the next man, I assure you. I am not one to waste what little life we have left, but I understand that we must sacrifice the few to save the many."

"I trust they will not go on this excursion alone?"

"No, the Survey Corps' finest will attend also. I do not for intend every citizen to die, but I estimate that even with our soldiers' help, enough people will die in order for the stress on our resources to be significantly reduced."

"Well that clears up any worries I held, if no one has any ideas forthcoming or any reservations against Commander Smith's solution, then I will declare this court adjourned until next week where we will discuss the matter of the orphaned children."

Erwin raised his hand, "I hope you are not about to argue against your own idea."

"No, however I want to discuss the possibility of the retrieval mission having another primary objective."

The commander sighed, this had gone on long enough without the Commanders questionable mission objectives. "I'm sure you can discuss the matter with me at a later point in time, and I will come to conclusion on whether or not I deem it a reasonable mission at that time. For now, I declare this court adjourned."

The hammer went down with a resounding finality.

* * *

It was a simple mission.

There would be little to no danger. Any titans that stood in the way of their final destination would easily be distracted at all the vulnerable humans that couldn't fight back and kill them, they were diversions. And he would seal the hole in the Wall Maria.

And nothing went wrong.

But it all went wrong for her.

* * *

_Upon leaving Wall Rose, you will branch out into three groups. One group will be traveling due north towards the city of Trost, this group will be comprised of Eren Jaeger, Levi Ackerman and a number of the Survey Corps' veteran soldiers as well as the greatest amount of volunteers._

* * *

Armin was placed in the same group as Mikasa, who would be heading out north east, and would be the group which would travel the furthest from the walls second only to Eren's squad.

Mikasa was none too happy with being separated by from Eren as she hadn't had to endure such a thing since the formation of the new Levi squad two years ago now. At least not for such long periods of time, despite Mikasa's skill and the Captain's constant lectures on the matter of trust, he didn't trust anyone as he trusted Eren and would they would often lead at a distance from the rest of the squad, so they could scout the area and report back at short intervals.

"I'm stronger than all of them."

"Mikasa you're being unreasonable, you were put where you are for a reason."

"Eren's right, Mikasa you may be stronger but these are seasoned soldiers, they've faced titans many times before and lived, you need to understand that sheer strength won't do it neither will simple skill, because they have a sharpened skill set that you won't be able to compare with."

Mikasa stayed silent but when Armin was called over by Squad Leader Hanji, she grabbed his hand, clasping it tightly in her two hands and whispered to 'please, please be careful' and Eren felt his resolve to remain angry melt when he took his hand back so he ended up wrapping his hands around her waist and enveloped them in a heartfelt hug, it was a promise.

* * *

In that moment he had felt like nothing could go wrong.

He had promised his life to her but she had not extended the same gesture.

Now, she lay on her bed where she had been confined to by the doctor, a cut so deep, _too_ deep on her waist and a leg alleviated. She stared at the hand that held hers so, _so_ tightly and she had never felt more cherished by her dearest friend. She wished that they could always stay like this.

Eren just wished that he could bring himself to care for people before they were ripped away from him, because he didn't want to live a life of regret any longer.

* * *

_The group which will be heading to the Trost District will have one primary objective, of greater importance than the protection of civilians. They will escort Eren Jaeger to Wall Maria where he will then using his hardening abilities as a titan shifter, to seal the doorway into which titans from the outside have been entering. This will mark the greatest victory for mankind, and we would have reclaimed all the land that was taken from us._

* * *

"Red signal flares spotted to the left, Captain!"

"Fire off a green signal flare in the north-easterly direction, Eren."

"Yes sir!"

So far the special objective squad had encountered very little casualties and had experienced no death. The mission was going as planned, and the civilians riding in the middle of the Scouts' protective barrier soon grew hopeful that they might just return home, that they would be the lucky few the Commander had spoken of.

"Titan spotted!"

Levi scanned the area until he saw the aforementioned titan. 15 meter class and it was walking at a slightly faster pace than the average titan. He turned to the soldier, "Can you fight?" The soldier had fell badly off his horse when it had been scared by an oncoming titan, the soldier had managed to kill the titan but was left with a fractured tailbone.

"No sir."

"Fine," the soldier nodded, although disappointed he could not be of greater service to the Captain, "Jaeger!"

"Yes sir!"

"You deal with it."

"Yes sir!"

The young man rode away from the group, heading towards the titan with his swords at the ready. The land they rode on was completely flat planed fields, so Eren would have to be careful. Although it travelled at a speed more characteristic of an abnormal, its behaviour was still predictable. Upon smelling the scent of the human, it turned its head to point at the soldier and travelled to meet him in the middle. At the right distance, Eren fired off both his grappling hooks so that they clung to each of the titan's ankles, and propelled him forward to pass underneath the titan. Then, before the titan could turn around, he launched his right hook to hook onto the skin at the titan's nape and flew upwards with his swords raised and cut the titan at just the right moment and asserted the right strength needed to fell it. With his swords still embedded deep in the dead titan's neck, he clung onto them as he felt the titan fall towards the ground. When he felt he was at a good height to fall from, he jumped off the titan, pulling his swords with him and fell onto the back of the disintegrating corpse of the titan.

Jumping off it, he reacquainted his feet with the firm, solid earth beneath him before whistling for his horse. After a small wait, he was heading back to the point of the formation at the side of Captain Levi.

The journey continued in a similar fashion.

* * *

" _Why, Mikasa?"_

"I needed to protect you."

"I can protect myself, Mikasa."

"No, you don't understand, I can't lose you again!"

"Mikasa, I don't want to lose _you._ I've lost people I've cared about too. I don't need to add you to the list," He stroked her cheek, red with frustration, "You underestimate just how much I need you in my life for you to be running headfirst into a place that will take you away from me."

* * *

_Upon reaching the breach in the wall, the group will form a protective wall around Eren Jaeger, and will fend off any incoming titan threats. Captain Levi and a group of modest elites will remain by Eren's side to fend off anything that gets past this barrier. Remember, the priority of your mission is the protection of Eren Jaeger, do not hesitate to let the civilians become the bait to lure the titans away. Unfortunate as it is, that is their purpose._

* * *

Over the years, Eren had gained a commendable amount of control of his titan shifting abilities, he did not lose control, and even in moments of complete bloodlust that he experienced from time to time, he was brought back easily enough with a simple command from the Captain's lips.

Perhaps that was the reason that they had kept each other so close, Levi trusted only himself to kill the boy, and Eren found Levi was the only one he trusted to keep himself from losing himself entirely.

The civilians, who hadn't really been briefed on the objective of the expedition (why would they have been, the end result for them was always going to be death so they were given no details nor wanted any), had quickly realised their purpose in that final stand, and willingly jumped off from the safety of the rooftops and led the titans away with no large amount of complaint.

Thanks to the sacrifices of the civilians, the mission had resulted in a success, punctuated with a yellow signal flare that for a moment was all anyone could see before the soldiers erupted into cheers. So bright and resonating and happy was the sight that they forgot all about the titans surrounding them, and the soldiers that had died, and the deaths of the helpless that they _didn't_ protect. They had _won_.

The Survey Corps soon decided that they enjoyed the sweet taste of success and craved for it with a newfound fervour.

* * *

"I need you trust me."

"I do trust you, Eren."

"You're lying to me, Mikasa." Eren sighed, looking into Mikasa's eyes. "I'm really not an idiot."

* * *

_Regardless of the outcome of the mission, the remainder of the special objective squad will head back to the camp the second group will have constructed in their absence. Here the special objective squad will be resupplied with gas and blades as well as receiving medical attention should they need it. Once everything has been taken care of you will meet the third group near the entrance of Wall Rose where they will have eliminated the titan threat to ensure your return is as smooth as possible._

* * *

" _Eren_!"

Their victory was empowering, it was joyous and it drowned the soldiers in its insatiable ecstasy and the soldiers really should have known better than to succumb to its cool and cleansing wave. They should have kept their heads above the water but instead they let themselves be swept away.

On the journey homeward bound, the outlying soldiers, the spotters, had neglected their duty. The consequences of their foolhardy actions were bad, to say the least.

Mikasa, who had been stationed in the borders of the formation of her group, had been one of the first who had spotted the returning group from afar. Her joy at seeing Eren just behind Captain Levi was short lived however, at the sight of some 10-odd titans flanking their left side.

She didn't think. While Eren had obtained the incorrect reputation of being the hot-headed ' _suicidal bastard_ ' who would run head first in to danger, it was Mikasa who was the real owner of the reputation. Years of having her ego fed would always undoubtedly lead to her overestimating her skill and overestimate her skill she did. She forgot at times that she had barely passed two years in active service and although it was no small feat, she seemed to think that no one possessed an ounce of the skill needed to protect her friend.

Before she knew it she was launching herself at a titan that had gotten too close to Eren, she missed Eren expertly swerving away from its attacking hand and the look of pure terror that was etched onto his features.

She blinked. And her eyes were greeted with the image of a grinning titan observing her. In her shock she didn't notice that she could no longer feel her leg, instead she looked at the titan standing eye to eye to each other through blank eyes, as if she was already dead to the world.

It scared Eren.

It was as if everything was moving in slow motion, as if he was watching with another pair of eyes and Mikasa was about to be snatched away from him, and painstakingly slowly he snapped to action.

_To ensure your return is as smooth as possible._

It wasn't.

He grappled onto the exposed neck of the titan and with no small amount of gas rose to meet the weak point of the titan, ignoring the scream his actions elicited from Captain Levi, just barely timing the slash at the nape right and using the momentum the gas provided him with, swung so he faced the hand that was now empty of Mikasa, instead hanging limply in the air. He grappled onto the underside of the loosed fist, dropping his blades so he could catch Mikasa who had begun her decent- too fast- to the ground. Gritting his teeth in determination, he just caught Mikasa in his arms before she met her death on the ground.

Eren's hands were occupied with Mikasa so their landing was a rough one. By the time they rolled to stop, the pair were littered with bruises and their uniforms dirtied. A red patch tainting her white shirt.

Anger thundered within him, " _What the hell were you thinking_?"

* * *

" _What the hell were you thinking_?"

"Eren, ple-"

"No, Mikasa." He sighed, running a distressed hand through his hair, "I can take care of myself. I know I might not have been as smart as Armin or as strong as you, but what do you honestly think I have been doing all these years? I graduated 5th, Mikasa! It may not have been first but it damn well proves something!"

"Eren, I know tha-"

"No, Mikasa, you don't! I'm stronger than you think, I'm sick and tired of people treating me as if I'm useless without my titan shifting abilities, I'm not. But I've never thought that you would treat me in the same way," Mikasa tried to grab his hand but he snatched his hand away, looking disgusted with it, "I've trained so hard that I can work in a pair with the Captain, so _we_ can fight as equals, instead of you always coddling me, I don't want or need that." Eren sighed, trying to keep his frustration in check, ' _why does everyone underestimate me?'_

"It's not about that anymore, I don't want you to experience anymore pain," Mikasa scratched at her neck, she still felt the weight of her scarf, still felt it wrapped around her neck like the first time she wore it, "It's changed you."

Eren scoffed, "You think I don't know that? I've never been the same, I _killed_ two men to save you, I watched my mother being eaten by a titan, I remember seeing myself eat my father like it was yesterday, and I grieve over every death I could have stopped like the pain was still raw and fresh in my mind," Eren tilted her face so that she was looking directly at him, and his voice softened, "But I would kill anyone and anything if it were so I could save you."

* * *

' _But I would kill anyone and anything if it were so I could save you.'_

Everyone present in that moment would always recall the bloodcurdling scream of rage that echoed in the plains as Eren entered a state of uncontrollable bloodlust.

He was so, _so_ angry, and so relieved and he wanted to kill anything that would take those precious to him away. He darted through the skies, cutting through the air and one by one each titan lay rotting on the ground, he moved at such a staggering pace that only Levi could rival and slayed each titan with a scream of delight, vengeful and dangerous.

It was then that Captain Levi knew, that the boy's titan was not the thing that would be difficult putting down, but him. Eren. Those eyes so full of life, and power and rage, was truly a formidable force and that day he looked at Eren with a hard earned respect that he did not award to just anyone.

* * *

She had lost part of her left leg.

The titan had gripped her too hard and resulted in a dislocated bone. The main artery was caught between the joints and due to poor circulation, the limb had had to be amputated.

Eren had begged to try and find if there was another way, not wanting to see her lose a part of herself, but saw reason after a while. Mikasa agreed but no one could mistake the pain that crossed her face when she tried to walk for the first time, looking at the wooden stick with a gut wrenching sadness, so thick that when she began to sob, Armin and Eren could do nothing but cry with her.

It was from sheer force of will from Eren that she even tried to learn to walk again, to run again, to do anything without the limb that she so heavily relied on. It was Eren's determination that got her through the hardest of times, where she felt content to be bedridden for the rest of her days. So when she returned to active service, she had never felt more indebted to him in her entire life.

But both were content with this new relationship that they had found.

* * *

Children danced and laughed in the towns, finally with enough food in their bellies to feel energised in what felt like years.

Those that had been orphaned cried instead, looking at their new homes with an acute pain, because their memories lied somewhere else along with their parents but those same children would grow to be the greatest soldiers, doctors and teachers the human race could offer, as they knew how a life could be cut short and promised to make good on each of their parents' sacrifices.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for all the line breaks and I hope you understand what was being said, if not, let me know and I'll answer!
> 
> On another note. this is my first SnK fanfiction and honestly I'm so surprised that it was Eremika because I am an Ereri shipper through and through. So if you spy hints, they were intentional. I wrote this very quickly (to my sluggish standards) and honestly it was to vent my frustration at Eren always being portrayed as stupid and incapable when he clearly is not, in my opinion, and also because I would like to see Mikasa and Eren fight as equals.
> 
> Also can you detect the slight dislike I hold for Mikasa? Because I can.


End file.
